Ever had one of those days where you don't know what to do or who you should hang out with, and you just kinda... wander around and try talking with another group when you're outside of the circle? It's weird and... kinda sad actually.

Has there ever been that one person who is just so easy to diss and tease, it almost makes you want to cry in joy? That person for me is my best friends Katy's boyfriend. I deemed him unworthy from the moment I saw him. Now whenever I do see him, I make jokes about him, diss him, and all the while Katy is laughing too. It's obvious she finds her own boyfriend fun tease. There have also been many occasions when he has said he wanted to hit me, but when I stand up and loom over him (actually, he's much taller than I am) then he sorta just shrinks back and says he's getting ready to run. 

I may seem like a bad person now, but I just can't help it. This is so funny and enjoyable to me!!

I think I've always been that one person who can never stop laughing, or making someone else laugh with my ridiculous comments and gestures. As a result, people laugh whenever they see me because they end up recalling something I had said, and others around me and that person either think two things:

1) "I guess that person is a weird nerd or something."

or

2) "Haha, she must've told another joke. I rememeber that one time when she said..."

I find that showers are amazing. They make you feel nice and clean, make you sound like a professional singer, and help you make all of life's decisions.

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I've always loved that one kid who always argues with the teacher and ends up entertaining the whole class.

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"What do you like to do for fun?" a teacher asked.

"Well, sometimes when I'm bored, I ball up on the kitchen floor and pretend I'm a crumb," I replied.

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I'll tend to be awkward if I find you attractive

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My old boyfriend had once said, "I AM GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH!

With my own mouth..

softly

because I like you."

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"People are like refrigerators; It doesn't matter if you're pretty or plain, tall or short, or have things on your face.... because what truly matters is what's inside you."

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"Ok, how do you politely tell someone you want to hit them with a brick?" a friend said.

"One wishes to acquaint your facial features with a fundamental item used in building walls repeatedly," another friend replied.

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If you should ever see me smiling on a Monday, you'll know immediately that an alien has killed me and used my skin as a disguise.

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If I drank alcohol, I'm then an Alcoholic. But if I drank Fanta, does that mean I'm Fantastic?

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You when you spend your parents' money:

"Ok, I'll take this and that and that.... $100? I'll take it!"

Spending your own money:

"$3 seems like a bit much..."

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The worst feeling is when soemone makes you feel special, then suddenly leaves you hanging, and you have to act like you don't care at all.

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AND NOW A USEFUL WORD OF ADVICE:

If you ever get stuffed in a trunk, disconnect the backlight wires, and when a cop pulls them over, kick the door so that they know you're there.

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When a person's laugh is funnier than the joke...

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"If you tickle me, I'm not responsible for you injuries," I said to a tickling addict.

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BEST FRIENDS:

They know how stupid you are and yet they still choose to be seen with you in public :)

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So me and my mom were fighting the other day where she was telling me to do something that I didn't want to and I said, "WHY?" And she replied with, "BECAUSE I SAID SO!" And I replied again with, "Great job, Mom, you should be lawyer."

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Sometimes I like to stand in front of the toaster and try not to flinch when the toast pops out.

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I've learned that once you start to dislike someone, everything they do begins to annoy you.

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"I love how our friendship is based off inappropriate humour, teasing other people, and awkward sexual comments," a guyfriend had once said.

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I'm quite proud of my heart. It's been played, stabbed, cheated, burned and broken, but somehow it still works.

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(Mentally preparing yourself to step out of the shower)

So my mom said that I'm childish and I looked her straight in the eye and said "you are what you eat" with a completely straight face. I  have never seen such a terrified face in my entire life.

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Today my gym class had to run a mile for our finals. Just as my coach blew the whistle, I said ,"FOR NARNIAAA!!!!". And I don't kow, it gave me a magical feeling, so I ran faster than ever before. I took 1fst place for my class.

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Today I was at Starbucks and said my name was Lord Voldemort. When my drink was ready, the cashier didn't say "She-who-must-not-be-named", but just Lord Voldemort. I was a little disappointed until another cashier said, "you can't say her name!" Her response? "Fear of a name only increases fear of itself." I was no longer disappointed.

My friend said, "Don't worry, spiders are smaller than you."    

 I replied with, "So are grenades."

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Ok, so my netflix wasn't working once, so I called the netflix guy and after he fixed it, he said "ok, let's try it". So we watched an hour long movie together, and well, I don't know, I think it was a date.

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Me eating in front of people:

Most girls: "I'll have the salad, please". *covers mouth while chewing*

Me: turns into a black hole and consumes all matter around me. No one is safe. There were no survivors.

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The human brain is amazing. It functions 24/7 from the time we were born and only stops when we take tests.

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My best friend said, "Titanic 3D is coming out. Maybe this time they'll see the iceberg." 

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Are you ever in a group of people and you say something really stupid, and everyone just kinda ignores it, and you kinda stare off into the distance thinking about how stupid you are.

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I'm shy at first but... ... I do the stupidest random crap when I get comfortable with someone!

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You never realize how inappropriate your music is until your parents are in the car with you.

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Trust me, when I woke up this morning, I had no plans to be this amazing. But hey, stuff happens.

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If Facebook should ever shut down, you'd see people roaming the streets shoving pictures into people's faces screaming, "DO YOU LIKE THIS??? DO YOU!!??"

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Mom said: "are you talking back to me?!"

I said: "yes, mom, that's how a conversation works."

 I love laughing. So when I see or hear something funny, I just HAVE to share it. Kinda like this:

THE LIST OF THINGS TO DO TO MAKE YOUR DAYS HAPPIER

1. Buy a parrot. Teach the parrot to say, "help! I've been turned into a parrot!"

2. Change Facebook status to "No One". Like people's statuses...

3. Put blue Gatorade in a Windex bottle. Drink it in public...( or you could also put cranberry juice in a wine bottle, if you prefer, but then you'd have to act drunk too)

4. Go to Ikea. Hide in a wardrobe. When someone opens the wardrobe, jump out and yell "FOR NARNIAAAAA!!!!!!!!!"

5. Change iPod name to "the Titanic". Download new songs. Be amused by the fact that The Titanic is syncing.

6. Find a cookie. Tell yourself that eating the cookie is a bad idea. Eat the cookie anyway. Regret eating the cookie. Deal with guilt by eating more cookies.

 Now presenting..... a laughing nightmare.